By Funeral-Link New Zealand | Posted: Wednesday February 21, 2018
Funeral-Link know grief is a natural response to loss, but it’s not uncommon for grieving people to sometimes wonder if they’re going crazy!
Many find it can be disorienting and difficult to manage. "Both of us were knocked over by how unpredictable and intense grief was for us at times, especially in the early days."
It helps to know that grief is a healing process. It moves us through a whole mix of reactions to help our minds and bodies gradually get used to living without the person who has died. It can’t be hurried. Grief takes all the time it needs to take.
If our love for the person who has died was strong and deep, our grief will be strong and deep too.
Grief helps us to get used to the reality of what’s happened, but people can naturally tend to see it as an enemy and try to fight it off. After all, we probably don’t want that new reality! However, avoiding or denying grief doesn’t serve us well. It will likely mean it will break through unpredictably and powerfully sometime in the future, and may even make us ill as our body strains to manage it inside us.
So, go with it. Grief has no set timetable. It might be hard to believe right now, but it does get easier to handle and the reactions become less intense.
Your grief experience will not be exactly the same as anyone else’s, because we’re all different. No one size will fit all. There are no set rules to follow, and grief isn’t a test, a race or a competition. Your grief journey will be personal to you, so do it in the way that makes most sense to you.
Funeral-Link members are in each region throughout New Zealand. They share each others values and are able to support families through the journey of change. see: www.funeral-link.co.nz for your local member.